10 Best
19.08.2011, Words by Ruth Saxelby
Dogs doing lists #6: What You'll Find on FAC 819
- Dogs leading Friedrich Engels on a tour of The Factory and asking timidly, in conclusion, “Is this what you had in mind…?”
- Dogs cradling the body of Ian Curtis (played by Sean Harris) as the Ghost of Ian Curtis, played by the Ghost of the Real Ian Curtis, executes a single dead fly dance maneuver and laments, “It is exactly as I remember.”
- Dogs immortalizing the 3,000 pigeons poisoned by Shaun Ryder in a Warhol-style silkscreen group portrait entitled Blue Monday.
- Dogs dropping a tablet of ecstasy into a toilet at the Haçienda and groaning, “Now how do I feel??”
- Dogs walking into a puddle of Shaun Ryder’s spilled methadone, and sliding, wobbling, flailing, windmilling, gyrating, slip-jigging, and finally—this is true1—hovering horizontally for a fraction of a second as a slide whistle ascends and descends a scale before a splash cymbal marks their sudden crash landing.
- Dogs plucking the stars delicately out of the sky as the inhabitants of the known universe collectively turn and raise a dubious eyebrow in the direction of Ian Brown.
- Dogs brandishing the diamond-encrusted skull of John Squire as they wash ashore on Spike Island, demanding, “Give me culture.”
- Dogs sobbing and gasping for air as Bez’s bent, broken body is discovered in the wreckage of a looted storefront on live television.
- Dogs stumbling into a hospital with a single bullet lodged in their forehead, and explaining just as they expire, “It seems like there’s a hole in my dreams.”
- Dogs firing a blowgun at a vision of the Lord God (played by Steve Coogan) as He opines on the lessons of Factory Records, while off-screen the Real and True God Almighty swings gently in a noose, bearing a note containing His last will and testament: “Let’s forget this ever happened.”
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[1] Let this also serve as a metaphor for the Madchester scene and period, its aspirations and successes.
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